Brag to Yourself: How Self-Affirmations Benefit You

Self-affirmations can help you lead a healthier, happier life.
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So often as children, we’re told not to brag. We’re told to be humble. We’re told not to be full of ourselves, not to be selfish, and to always put others first. We’re told the world doesn’t revolve around us and that we are just one tiny speck in the universe.

And while all those bits of advice may be said with the best of intentions, they don’t exactly do wonders for our self-esteem, do they? There’s this strange disconnect in life, where we’re told we’re not “all that,” but at the same time, we are expected to be confident and believe in ourselves. It makes for a difficult balance sometimes.

There’s certainly a difference between being self-absorbed and merely confident in yourself, but it can be hard to toe the line successfully. Some fall into the habit of never believing they are “worth it” or good enough. Others cross over and come off as conceited and vain.

But there is a middle ground—and believe it or not, it can include self-affirmations. Research from Carnegie Mellon University suggests that practicing the daily mantra of self-affirmation can improve problem-solving skills and reduce stress. It can give you an improved self-image and self-worth, and it’s anything but bragging.

“A brief self-affirmation activity is sufficient to buffer the negative effects of chronic stress on task performance and can improve the ability to solve problems in a flexible manner during high stress periods,” researchers said. “Our study suggests that self-affirmation may increase creativity and insight in stressed individuals.”

Remember "The Little Engine That Could?"
Well, you can, too!
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“I’m good enough.”

“I’ve got this.”

“People like me.”

“I am an intelligent, graceful, and beautiful person.”

“I am important.”

Affirmations such as those can make all the difference in life. Believing in yourself is key to success, and when done right people will see it as anything but bragging. You are worth it. Stop doubting yourself, and go get ‘em, tiger.

Learning To Love Your Body

One of the things women seem to have the hardest time with is loving their bodies. We beat ourselves up, always finding something to criticize or be unhappy with. I have one friend who is constantly dieting and beating herself up if she slips up and eats a cookie one day. She doesn’t need to lose weight, but she is so afraid of gaining weight that she gives herself a huge guilt trip over every little thing.

I think she’s beautiful, but she finds a million tiny things to pick apart and feel bad about.

Unfortunately, my friend is just one example. The vast majority of women are unhappy with their bodies for one reason or another. Did you know that only 4% of women around the world believe they are beautiful? I don’t know about you, but I look around me every day and I see far more beautiful people than four percent.

Do you think you are beautiful? I'm still working on it, but I'm believing myself a little more every day.

When will we free ourselves from these oppressing standards of "beauty?"
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The problem is that we are holding ourselves to unrealistic standards of beauty, and many women lack the self-confidence to believe in themselves and their beauty. 

Late last month, the New York Presbyterian/Weill Cornell Medical Center held a spring luncheon to benefit the hospital’s Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology. The luncheon was attended by New York “it” girls like Lauren Santo Domingo, Sofía Sanchez Barrenechea, and Fabiola Beracasa and hosted a panel discussion called “Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: A Conversation About Beauty and Self Image.”

The panel conversation included Dr. Gail Saltz and Dr. Amy Wechsler. “Today’s women are under extraordinary pressure to look physically beautiful and physically young in a way that, frankly, is inconsistent with real life,” said Saltz. “And they’re supposed to look that way while being the superwoman mom who takes care of her family and has a great career.”

So how do we, as women, start treating ourselves better?

In an interview with TODAY, Saltz said it all starts with loving your body—even if it isn’t perfect (whose is?). The trick is everything in moderation. “Rather than starving and exercising like mad I advocate eating sensibly and in a healthy way,” she says, “and learning new skills that are physical, yet suit your personality.”

Essentially, everyone is different. Yes, we all should be active, but it should be in a way we enjoy—why kill yourself doing exercise you hate every day? If running isn’t your thing, try something else, like yoga, dancing, golf, tennis, rock climbing, hiking, or any number of things.

“Spend a day adding up how many minutes you spend criticizing yourself and then ask yourself if there is some other way you would rather be spending that time,” Saltz advises.

What could you do with your extra time?